Toad Houses
by ChaosToadette
Summary: Toad's business selling power-ups in World 5 is having a slow day, until Toadette shows up and tries to bribe him for something she can't pay with in cash...


Nestled within the deep woods of World 5, a young and aspiring toad retainer set up his mushroom house full of trinkets and wares, ready to help out passing heroes for the cost of a few coins. Toad had figured this was a good place to open his shop, as the property value was low, it had a great view of the scenic forest... And it was also fairly close to a lake full of poison and massive brambles of ravenous piranha plants. Most people who made it out (alive) would be in dire need of some power-ups and 1-up mushrooms, so he was bound to get a good bounty.

Unfortunately, things were slow today. It was already nearing sunset, and not a single person had stopped by. "Had all their lives been lost? Are players just getting better at this level? Maybe they're using cheat codes," he thought. No matter the reason, the lack of business was disheartening and put him in a very bad mood. Toad had even begun to ponder whether or not he should just close shop early until he heard the unmistakable click and jingle of his front door opening.

"'scuse me!" A shrill voice called out. "Anyone in here?"

Toad recognized the voice. It was none other than his plaited pink counterpart, Toadette! He headed towards the front of the store, sporting a look both of delight and confusion.

"Hiya, Dette. Didn't expect to see you here." He gently scratched the back of his head. "Are you... Saving the Princess?"

She scoffed and smirked at him. "Yeah, but I mean— Who hasn't yet? You've done it a few times yourself, eh?"

He glanced away and fidgeted with his hands softly. "Well... Yeah... But the side-scrolling adventure life isn't really for me. I'm much happier just sitting back and helping the REAL heroes out."

Toadette teasingly sneered at him. "What, you don't think I'm a real hero? Do I have to wear a hat and mustache for you?"

"N-No!" Toad gulped, face tense and anxious. "I-I, I mean— I didn't expect you to be one doing it, b-but I have no doubt that you'll-"

His nervous spiel was cut off by her bursting into laughter. She wiped a lone tear and leaned her elbow against the counter.

"I'm just busting your balls, T. I know it's weird seeing me here, just think how I feel!" She leaned back and clasped her hands together, rubbing them eagerly. "Now, show me what kinda goodies you got!"

"O-Of course," he stammered, still fumbling over his words. He bent over and lifted a heavy burlap sack onto the counter, unfurling it and revealing a trove of flowers, mushrooms, and suits galore. With a gleam in her eye, Toadette began to pick through the pile and place a few of the goods into her arm.

"I'll take this one... And this one... Ooh! This could be useful. OH! And definitely gotta have one of these." After a few seconds, she looked back up at him. "Alright, alright, I'll take all of these."

"Sure, that'll be 35 coins."

Toadette's face suddenly became pale. She looked around a bit before meekly responding.

"I, uh... I don't have that much."

Toad leaned back into a chair with an unamused look. "Well I'm sorry, Toadette, if you don't have the coins you can't buy them. Maybe just one power-up? A single fire flower can go a long way in the right hands."

"Oh come on, there's no 'best friend' discount?! You know I'm dirt poor!"

"You're in World 5, you should have found plenty of coins by now!"

"I don't think you quite understand just HOW bad with money I am." She plainly retorted with a squint.

"The rules still apply. No gold, can't be sold."

Toadette sighed in defeat and began to put the items away. ...That is, until she got another gleam in her eye and stared him down.

"So there's no 'best friend' discount... Alright, okay. But is there perhaps," She began as she started to gently stroke his hand, "A 'friends with benefits' discount?"

Now Toad squinted at her. He was suspicious of her tone. "What's that supposed to mean."

She gently twirled one of her large bulbous braids in her hand, looking away and feigning innocence.

"I know you and I are no strangers to the Two-Toad Tango. The night we won the 150cc All-Cup Tour... The day you got promoted to Head Retainer... Waluigi's Christmas Party... We've known each other for a while, and I'd say we're a little more than just buddies at this point."

Toad was having none of it. His face was beet red. "Are you trying to bribe me with sex?!"

"Woah! You said it, not me! I didn't have full-on SEX on my mind when I said that...!"

She paused, then looked away.

"...but yeah i was hoping you'd take a blowjob instead of money"

Toad grit his teeth. "Absolutely not! I'm a fair businessman, I don't just give anyone free stuff for favors and bribes! And I'm certainly not going to share what should be a passionate, heartfelt moment between two people for something as silly as a store discount!"

Toadette held up her hands defensively. "Okay, okay! I was just pressing my luck. If you really want cold, hard cash, I'll take my leave and come back when I can pay fairly." She rolled her eyes. "I was just thinking that... Y'know, you must be so lonely stationed out here with no friends or family to talk to. Sitting here... All day... Just waiting for people to pop in and throw money at you... But hey. I ain't a clerk, I dunno what it's like. I'll go. Sorry to bother you, Toadie."

Toadette began to leave when Toad could feel his will slowly breaking. He wanted to be fair and earn money just like any other hard-working toad, but how could he honestly refuse an offer like that? While they weren't a full-fledged couple, Toad definitely had feelings for her deep in his heart. And after the handful of heated, passionate (and drunk) moments they've shared in private, part of him craved more of her.

He gripped his fist and slammed it against the counter, sighing loudly.

"Toadette, wait."

The sound of defeat in his voice made her grin naughtily before turning back to him with a cheerful smile.

"Yeah?"

"I... I accept your offer. You're right. I'm so lonely out here, and nobody's even come in today. If I'm not gonna get any money... I might as well spend some time with you."

"Awwww, Toadie!" Her cheeks flushed pink. She liked to tease him but was always charmed when he spoke lovingly to her.

"BUT. I just want to start simple. Just a hug and a kiss and the like. And..." His lip quivered and he seemed to look embarrassed. "We'll see where it leads there, I guess."

"Whatever you want, baby. I'm game!"

"Lock the door. The last thing I want is Mario or Luigi barging in on us..."

Toadette complied and then met with him as he continued to remain seated. His face was burning red and he couldn't look up at her, almost shameful of how easily he gave in to her dirty deal.

"Where's my seat?" She mocked.

"Uh... Well... I figured you could just sit on me. OOF!" The wind was nearly knocked out of him as Toadette immediately planted herself onto his lap. She delicately put her hand on his chin and tilted his head up so the two met eyes. "You're so beautiful..." He faintly whispered, almost unable to speak.

"Shut up and start smooching me." She teased once more as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and brought him close.

The two toads locked lips and slowly kissed each other, breathing softly between each kiss. Toad put his hands onto her sides and squeezed gently as he took in the warmth of her body, and her sweet, mushroomy aroma. He was flooded with feelings of comfort and arousal as their kisses slowly became more passionate.

Her teeth gently grazed against his bottom lip as he felt a bit of tongue attempt to poke into his mouth, causing him to squeak nervously. He opened his eyes and looked at her, being met with a warm, seductive gaze, and gave in once more as she pushed deeper into their kiss.

Toadette hummed as her more forceful actions were rewarded with a small budding bulge in his lap. Now focused on getting him fully in her control, she began to slowly grind against him, riding the bulge.

Toad was already beginning to sweat when he saw her gaze, but now he was downright clammy. He could feel his hands getting uncomfortably warm and moist against her dress as he broke the kiss for a small "sorry" and dove straight back in. He could feel her getting hot and obviously rubbing up against him, but he was done fighting. He just wanted to hold her and absorb every last feeling she could give him. Overwhelmed by lust, he broke the kiss again and began to pepper her cheek with smaller smooches, moving down her neck to her collarbone.

Toadette excitedly chirped. She felt that he was fully erect and pressing up against her. "That was fast! I forgot how much you liked kissing!"

"It's not just the kisses... It's you."

"Uh-huh. You ready for this or not?"

"I-I don't want the blowjob anymore, I just want you..."

Toadette looked smug. "Oh, so NOW you want to go all the way. Fine by me, I'll just save my mouth for more kissing~."

Toad decided to take the opportunity to sass her back, getting a smug little look of his own. "I also didn't want to make you wait. I can feel you're just as excited as I am."

She gulped. He wasn't wrong... While she often took control, feeling his tiny kisses and responsive twitches drove her crazy. She blushed and shook off her embarrassment.

"Y-Yeah, sure. Get your stupid pants off."

Toad huffed and leaned back, grabbing the hem of his harem pants. He glanced away awkwardly, not wanting to see how hard he really was. He pulled down his iconic white trousers as Toadette teasingly cupped her hand against his bulge through his underwear, green and patterned with cute pixel 1-ups.

"Hurry it up already!"

He groaned as he slid those off too, presenting her with a short, stocky, mushroom-shaped member already oozing with precum (his Toad Chode, if you will).

Her voice fluttered with awe as if looking at fine art. She ran her thumb against his shaft up towards the head, squeezing lightly and making him squeak.

"And you...?"

"Oh, yeah, me... Heh, you better not look away for this one!"

How could he? She kept a flirty smirk as she turned around, pulling off her white tights and revealing a plump rump being barely held back by a pair of simple cotton panties. He was practically drooling, longing to feel her.

"M-May I?"

"Knock yourself out~"

He nervously got out of his seat, almost dizzy from the massive shift in blood flow. She bent over and playfully jiggled her rear at him, nonchalantly snapping off her bra from under her dress as he gently hooked his thumbs beneath her underwear and pulled them down slowly, admiring how wet she was.

"Goodness, it's been a while..."

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I haven't shaved in a while, sorry.

"What? N-No! I mean, just... this. Every time I do this, it still feels like the first time..."

"...Heheheh. You're real cute, you know that? The world needs more fellas like you that really take the time to admire every last second of a simple fu- uuaahhh..."

Her words trailed off as Toad gently pressed his face between her legs, squeezing her thighs and licking at her. His tongue was smooth and warm, gliding against her lips. She quickly covered her mouth and grabbed at the counter, groaning into her hand and pressing her rear against his face. She could feel him reposition himself lower so his tongue could flick softly against her clit, increasing her already-intense excitement. She pulled her hand away and sputtered in a daze.

"W-Woah, I didn't see that coming... Fffuck you're good, still got it..." She gasped and tensed up, pulling away from him. "O-Okay, enough of that, you're gonna make me cum way too soon!"

Toad stood back up, wiping his mouth against his arm. "I'm sorry, I couldn't resist." He joked with a smile. She immediately pushed him back into his chair.

"Shut up. I'm more than ready now..." She positioned herself over his groin and slowly lowered her body as he held her and his length steady. Both toads sighed longingly as he pushed into her and slipped in effortlessly.

Toadette slid off her vest and dress, struggling for a few seconds to pull it over her giant head, and returned to her arms around the shoulders pose from before, breasts and belly pressing against his bare chest. Toad purred and resumed their passionate kiss as she bounced on him at a gentle but steady pace.

As he kissed deep and stroked her hair with one hand, he used his other hand to explore her various curves, rolls, and folds as he relished the feeling of her enveloping him. She would gently squeeze against him with every descent, and he felt her fingers curl ever-so slightly each time.

As for Toadette, she wanted nothing more than to go full speed and ride him dry. But it was too soon. She knew how much Toad enjoyed taking it slow, and she was starting to see why. She could really admire everything about him, sight, feeling, smell, and especially his small, adorable grunts. She felt him filling her up as she got lower and lower with each bounce, and his cock twitched excitedly each increasing centimeter.

Toad broke the kiss and sighed loudly, nestling his head into her breasts as she held her head up. He playfully motorboated her, causing both toads to giggle, and Toadette to pick up the speed. He huffed and squeezed her ass, keeping her steady and staring deep into her eyes as she tightened her grip against his shoulders.

"Ah, ah, mmh... Why'd you have to give me surprise oral, I'm so wet I feel like I could slip right off of you..."

"I've got you... Go as fast as you want..."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, please..." He rested his head against her breasts again as she bounced faster and fiercer, causing an audible CLAP to sound with each descent. Her squeaks turned to moans as the two felt each other hitting all the right places. Toad whined and squeezed her tighter, feeling himself edge closer and closer to climax.

"Ghh... Nnh... W-Wait!"

Toadette stopped, panting and looking down at him with a concerned look. "What?"

"I-I'm sorry... I've just been squeezing your butt so much that..." He pleaded to her with an embarrassingly desperate look. "Please let me fuck your ass!"

She went silent. She stared at him for a few seconds before bursting into cackling laughter. Toad felt his heart sank, and was almost close to becoming flaccid with shame until she spoke up again.

"Are you kidding?! Of COURSE you can! Oh baby, that's been on my bucket list forever!"

Toad looked a bit confused but decided not to question it, lest the moment be ruined. He helped her up as she stretched and turned around, bending over the counter. She raised her backside and looked back at him with a dirty gaze and a sultry voice.

"Come and get it, big boy."

Toad practically yelped as he grabbed her sides and plunged in, immediately captivated by how tight she was. Digging his feet into the floor he went as fast as he could without hurting her, holding her tight and kissing her neck ravenously. She was so overwhelmed with emotion that all she could do is whelp in return.

He used a free hand to pull at her hair then spank her hard, adjusting his body to cradle tightly against hers. He was now so deep that he could feel his balls slapping against her drooling gash with each thrust, and he felt she was very close.

"Guh, guh-! Fuck! Fuck! Gonna c-! Ah! Gah!"

Amidst her rambling and cursing, Toad went as hard as he could, biting her neck. She screeched and tightened to a vice-grip on his cock, forcing him to cum as well. His voice trilled in broken yelps, hoarse from all his previous noise. Toadette clawed at the counter and tensed as she was promptly pumped full with his cum, the two panting and sweating.

"...Guaaaghh!" Toad cried out as he finally moved away, letting the excess cum ooze out of her hole and trickle down.

"Ah, I... Wah, WOOH...!" She could barely speak. Toad weakly grabbed a towel from the other room and placed it under her, letting her sit and rest, and lying beside her, the two admiring each other.

"...How was that?" He purred. Toadette only responded with a firm OK sign and a big grin.

"Def... Definitely gotta do that again."

"Maybe in an actual bed next time though, huh? I'm beat... Oh! Your items, I almost forgot..."

Toad shakily attempted to collect himself and stuff his dripping, sweaty body back into his clothes, while Toadette couldn't even be bothered and remained a nude, sweaty lump on the floor. He took the items she was eyeing and put them into a new bag, along with a few starmen.

"Here's a little extra. I think you more than deserve it," he said with a soft smile.

Toadette smiled back and weakly got up, eventually getting dressed again. After she was all set to return to adventure, Toad stopped her at the door, holding her hand.

"One more thing, Toadette."

"Mm?"

He stroked her hair and leaned in close, whispering in her "ear" with a naughty smile.

"As soon as the Princess is safe and everyone is back at the castle, we're doing that again."

Toadette sneered back. "I'll be thinking of that thick cock the whole trip." They shared one more simple kiss as she exited the mushroom house, resuming her quest to save Peach. Toad couldn't help but stand by and admire her ass, undoubtedly still stuffed to the brim with his cum.

Hopefully it doesn't get in her way too much.


End file.
